Musings of a Repentant Pantser

That may sound like the confession of a playground bully, but I'm not talking about actually pantsing anyone, I'm talking about pansting my novel.

Photo via Unsplash

In the world of writers, I'm the type who follows the call of my characters, their quirks and whims, to discover my finale. In other words, I'm a pantser.

It's not the most organized process, but it is fun and unexpected. So far, it's been ideal for a girl who came to writing from an entirely unrelated field.

However, October marked the first month of My First Ever Novel Writing Class, so I was required to switch gears. A few weeks in, I was assigned the task of outlining a novel I'd hardly begun to write with characters I barely knew. I was stumped. I tried. I really tried. But I could only come up with six events. Six. Measly. Events. I don't know if you've read anything lately, but six measly events do not a novel make.

I gave up. My instructor didn't know what my novel was about, right? She hadn't been in the critique group who had heard the first couple pages of Rapunzel. So I outlined the novel I finished in August, a Rumplestiltskin retelling. Since my goals for the novel writing course included rethinking the novel I'd finished as well as plotting out a new novel, I only felt slightly like a great big cheater pants.

Okay, maybe more than slightly.

The next week, my instructor, the amazing Mette Ivie Harrison, assigned a synopsis. Again, I tried. Due to a few exercises along the way,

1. fleshing out my characters more fully,
2. diagramming how the characters interacted with and influenced one another (aka my version of fleshing out events in the plot),
3. returning to original sources to reread the original fairy tale,

I sat down at my computer and followed my characters through to a working synopsis. The process was as amazing as jumping in and writing.

That brings me to today, where I admit that there is something to this outlining thing. I have a better picture of where Novel Four is headed than I ever have before. I've also spent enough time away from Novel Three to have a good perspective about what needs to be tweaked, improved, and added.

Does this mean I have exchanged my proud-to-be-panster status for overly-exuberant plotter status? I enjoy chucking aside outlines and following characters in unexpected directions too much to become a die hard plotter. But I can finally see the benefits of spending more time getting to know my characters and story before actually writing it.

I might even stop mentally mocking the die-hard plotters for spending days and weeks and months organizing and reorganizing before writing. Maybe.

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For more about embarking on the writing journey, read:

Stop Talking. Start Writing.

Reviews: Give 'em to me!

The I-Don't-Suck-As-A-Writer Moment

The Inbetween Land

And if any of you out there are interested in serving as reviewers, I'm offering the eBook version of Midnight Sisters  in exchange for honest reviews. For my philosophy on reviews, please read Reviews: Give 'em to me! Leave me a comment or send me an email if you're interested!

A Call to Arms. A Call to Love.

I believe in the power of good women united by common goals. 

I also believe in the power of kindness and love to reach those goals. Recently, Open Thought Vortex Magazine invited me to share my thoughts on feminism during Women's Empowerment Month. I was pleased to share the following:

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Feminism gets a bad rap. The term has been twisted to convey something far different than its original definition:

1.  the theory of political, economic, & social equality of the sexes

2.  organized activity on behalf of women's rights & interests

Basic. Elegant. Yet somehow feminism has become associated with radical behavior, extremely liberal opinions, and pointing the finger of blame at men, politicians, society, etc.

I’m a 40-year-old woman from rural Utah who teaches kindergarten and writes Young Adult novels. I refuse to support action that harms, demeans, or degrades others whose sex, age, political views, or religion differ from mine. And since today’s predominant strategy for promoting women’s rights is shouting your grievances at the top of your lungs, I tend to distance myself from it. The kindergarten teacher in me can’t see the difference between that strategy and the kid who declares himself (or herself) King of the Jungle Gym and enforces his (or her) claim through a series of playground scuffles.

I’ve seen my fair share of intolerance. I live in a particularly diverse area in Northern Utah where there is often tension resulting from differing political standpoints, religious beliefs, and even warring gangs. Local Pastor Monica Hall stated, “[There is] a natural tendency to draw distinctions and define each other. Definitions such as: she is Muslim, he is black, she is Presbyterian, he is Latino, they are Mormon, etc. . . . Such definitions can draw boundaries of who WE are and who THEY are. These boundaries can be dangerous. They can be dangerous when we use the boundary of division to ignore human needs.”

That’s my main issue with feminism. When we paint ourselves as victims and everyone else as aggressors, there’s no one left to explore solutions to the common problems we face.

Actress Emma Watson had plenty to say on the subject. “If we stop defining each other by what we are not and start defining ourselves by who we are, we can be much freer.”

In my classroom alone, I encounter bias, misconceptions, and intolerance. Kids already have a lot of baggage by the time they step into my room.  I do my best to employ a practice that reaches hearts, souls, and minds. It’s called Love. Love and Listen.

If all we do is scream about the world’s injustices, nothing will ever change. But if we take on our noble role as women who lead, nurture, teach, inspire, and uplift, we can effect change.

Author Norah Ephron summed it up beautifully. “Above all, be the heroine of your own life.”

That’s what I want. That’s MY prime goal as a feminist, to be the best me I can be and to bring as many women, girls, mothers, and sisters along with me as possible.

Author Francesca Lia Block said, “Just like any woman . . . we weave our stories out of our bodies, some of us through our children, or our art; some do it just by living. It’s all the same.”

I effect change in my classroom and in my novels, with my students, friends, and family. I stand up for what I believe and I refuse to hide who I am. I am a woman and I am powerful. And I believe in the power of love and kindness.

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Thanks for dropping by, my dears! If you'd like to read more women's empowerment, revisit The Making of a Woman or pop over to OTV Magazine and peruse the March 2017 posts. And please leave me your thoughts on womanhood and feminism in a comment below. Go forth and be awesome, my friends!

The I-Don't-Suck-As-A-Writer Moment

Triumph 
(tri-umph)
noun
1. when writers read what they've written & don't die of shame.




I certainly hit the I-hate-my-manuscript phase with Becoming Beauty. So, I was surprised to reread my last version of Book Two and find it readable! That's encouraging! It's nice to know that even if there are issues, most of the large ones are resolved. Also, it's nice to know that I do not indeed suck as a writer!

When I get down, I try to remind myself of my experience with Becoming Beauty. Several unexpected things happened (even when I suspected I actually sucked as a writer).

Someone will quote you. It may sound dumb, but readers will have a favorite part of your book and they'll quote it online, on their blog, in a review. It may not be something you consider ultimately quotable, but yes, it will make you smile every time it happens

Someone will love your book. (And it won't just be your mother!) Complete strangers will give you 5 star reviews and sing the praises of your book. It seems weird before it happens and it seems weird when it happens, but it will happen. (Seriously. Lots of people loved Twilight!)

Someone will be impressed by the quality of your writing. Readers and reviewers will comment on themes and patterns in your writing you didn't put there intentionally. Who knows how it happens, but it does. (And it's awesome.)

Someone will find meaning in your book that will change the way they think. Be honest, special books have touched you, haven't they? And they affect how you view the world, write, and approach other books. Even if it's only in subtle ways. Trust me, it will happen with your books too.

Someone will utterly fall in love with your characters. (Okay...other than you.) Readers may threaten your life if so-and-so doesn't have a happy ending or events don't turn out as they expected. That's because they become invested in characters you created. We count that as a success!

I'm not brave enough to say that you'll be someone's favorite author. (Just writing that makes me want to cross my fingers, eyes, toes, and knock on wood at the same time!) But why couldn't it happen? Your favorite author was once just a writer who wasn't sure they didn't suck either. Someday, that could be you.

So  go ahead.
Embrace your awesomeness.
Admit that you're a writer. 
And quit thinking you suck.

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Author's note: It's possible I've just penned this post so I will be brave enough to publish another book. But I love being your cheerleader as well! I'd love to hear how you survive the Writer Suck moments in your life. Or if you're still wallowing in one. 

Let's chat! Leave me a comment!

The Writing Retreat

This spring I came to my beloved Writing Group with a plan. I wanted a Summer Writing Retreat.

My thought process was something like:

Ooh, it's going to be amazing! There will be time to work all the kinks out of my manuscript and interact with some of my favorite people! 

Can you tell I've never been to one of these before?

Sometimes it's best to create your own plan instead of following someone's tried and true method. (Plus tried and true sounds boring, while my plan centered around writing, playing, good food, a bit of shopping, and laughter. Lots of laughter.)

So, the ladies and I reserved a hotel near Park City, UT and began to plan. I'm mid-edit on Book Two and my goal was to make it much closer to the end. And hey, getting in several quiet hours of writing was very productive.

To my way of thinking, there have to be some givens in holding/attending a Writing Retreat:

Come to work. Bring your project(s) and have a personal goal in mind. (In case you're wondering, my goal was to make progress on my WIP and not to make everyone crazy.) If you don't think you can engage that long, have a back up plan like blogging, editing, world building, character development, etc.

Be prepared for distractions. My lovely friend Jo Ann Schneider informed me early on that she'd be bringing earplugs. She knows me way too well...but hey, I was quiet and well-behaved for so long! (For the Chatty Patties like me, bring earbuds so you can block out the other humans in the room you desperately need to chat up. For example, I edited to Glee on Netflix for two days.)

Leave time for fun. This may not seem important when you're on a business trip, but when you hit your goal--whether it's a time goal or a word count--you need to hit the town, hit the restaurant, or hey, hit the sack. I don't know about you, but I need a brain break after a long day of intense focusing.

If the above picture doesn't express how well our weekend went, I don't know what will. We had an amazing time! It may not have been the most productive I've ever been--traveling all over for several weeks takes a toll--but I'm proud of the work I did. It's set me firmly on the path to polishing up Book Two for publishing later this year. And we're already thinking of what we want to do next year.

Bear Lake for Writing Retreat 2017, anyone? Don't forget to pack your swimsuits and be ready for a Raspberry Shake break. Because that's totally happening.

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What are your thoughts? What type of Writing Retreats have you attended? Thanks for dropping by!

Purpose Reborn

So much stronger than fleeting happiness, a sense of purpose can drive us forward through the dark days.

What was I thinking when I published a book, took on the unknown world of marketing, left my job, started a new job, had hand surgery, underwent various dental procedures, and participated in several author events? 

No wonder I'm tired.

After the dust settled and the new car smell wore off those wonderful new experiences, the work of it settled into my bones and I understood what I'd gotten myself into. No matter how inspired I might have been to finish penning a chapter or complete a project, like I always do, I hit a place where I question my own capability and wonder if I can make it through. 

After reading A Room With a View in college, I have always thought of that state as being muddled. (Fabulous read, by the way.)

Photo courtesy of Upsplash.com

There are few endeavors I undertake lightly. I've always been a test the waters, then retest the waters again before jumping in kind of gal. So when I feel like I'm going through the motions, pasting on a smile while everything inside me is cold, it's particularly muddlesome. 

The cycle typically begins with a period of wallowing in couch potato land, accompanied by ranting, raving, and basic hermit behavior. (I try to keep this part strictly offline. To my dear friends, I love you and I'm sorry.) When I'm finally ready to take a proactive approach, I do the following:

I mentally review what brought me to this place and this decision. For me there is usually a pinnacle moment, a feeling of rightness that precedes the decision and gifts me with the purpose to see it through. Remembering that moment awakens at least a portion of that purpose again.

Sometimes taking a moment to breathe and rest, reconnect my heart and mind, and remove myself from the muddle is enough to recenter my mind. Music, art, theater, and literature all distract me from the drama of day-to-day life and help my mind refocus. On top of escape, the bonus gift of inspiration is just as likely to spark the next good idea, solution, or direction. 

Acting like an utter imbecile removes me from the muddle and allows me to examine the issue from the outside. Game night, chicken dances, kitchen yodeling, acting like a kids with kids, and about a million other pointless activities always help me remember who I am. Some people are off-put by silliness, but there is little I know that is better for retraining negative thoughts.

Each of us has moments when we lose sight of our purpose. As devastating as that might be, we can always reclaim it. And yes, I'm right there with you. Leave me a comment and tell me how you cope with life's muddles.

Laughter is the Best Medicine. Also Percocet.

You're all well aware of my philosophy on drama, right? Suck it up, laugh it off, only deal with what you have to? That's me. 

So when this summer's health problems hit, I was taken by surprise. (I didn't freak out horribly.) Honestly, the one million allergies diagnosis was a relief because it meant I wasn't sick all the time and with some treatment, I would feel better. I didn't panic about carpal tunnel surgery until I was on the gurney under the huge, bright surgery room lights and the anesthetic hadn't kicked in.

Before that point, I'd been making jokes. My mom said, “You're silly. And all they've given you is sugar water!” I was trying to ignore the large needle they'd shoved in my arm and the fact that we'd already waited a good two hours for the doctor to get started. A girl has gotta do something instead of just sit and stew, right? And it kept us both amused.

Later on when my friend sent me a selfie in a truly goofy pair of glasses, I remembered something else in my arsenal. My own crazy glasses. That first day we got some funny comments:
Hoe-lee-crap.
Are you surprised? She was completely drugged!
Well, you're having a goooood time!
I promise it wasn't the meds, but hey, a good dose of pain meds never hurt a gal, either! 

So, this is me. Saying thank you for all the laughter, support, prayers, kind thoughts, flowers, treats, and everything else that came my way. Every day I'd post updates and receive so much love in return. If my recovery is going well, it's because of you. Thank you, friends, family, and wonderful far off friends who support from the other side of the globe. I certainly needed it, because Percocet or not, we all need the to feel the love from time to time.

If, like me, you're going through a rough time, please remember that you're never alone. There are many who will uplift and tease until you feel like yourself again. Thank you, my friends.

Here's a bit more inspiration for you! What Doesn't Kill You, Cringe Worthy, Panic City, Population: 1, and Plot Twist!

Miranual for Life

Is It Just Me? The title along with that fabulous cover tells most of the story.

Have you ever felt like you were the only idiot in a sea of posh people who have it all together? That's the premise behind Miranda Hart's self-help book. I'm a huge fan of Miranda, a British show full of prat falls, running gags, and a colorful characters. So, when I discovered that Miranda Hart had written a book, I needed to take a peek. 

It's what she calls a Miran-ual for life, and covers everything from being non-musical to the horrors of weddings. Yes, that's right, horrible, try-to-behave-yourself-when-you're-on-display-for-everyone-to-see weddings. Miranda, whose own past (and present) are speckled with crazy foot-in-mouth moments, spends the bulk of the pages reassuring her readers that everyone has their issues, and the rest of them making you laugh out loud. It turns out no one is the poshy person they put forward. Isn't it time we embrace our uniqueness?

And coming from Miranda Hart, that advice is indeed reassuring. There's something unbelievably relatable about someone who accepts their own quirkiness and makes a career of it. That's “what I call” admirable.

So yes, if you need an ego boost or just a good laugh, pick up a copy of Is It Just Me? written in Miranda Hart's one-of-a kind comedienne style. You'll realize that no, it's not just you. We're all officially crazy. Isn't it such fun?

Check out Is It Just Me? on Goodreads or pick up a copy on Amazon. (And if you're reading this Miss Miranda, yes I'd love to be besties! Drop me a tweet, eh?)

Need something else to read? Check out some of my other recommendations: Love Triangle, Shmove Triangle, Letters To My Future Husband, Anne-with-an-E, Where Life Takes You, Persuaded, Pass the Pepper, or Geek Chic. Carry on, reader chums!

Ready or Not...

If you're like me, you know what's happening tomorrow, the day after tomorrow, and so on until the end of time. On occasion, a twist appears in the road. Sometimes instead of your regular run of the mill twist, there's a loop-the-loop wicked enough to trigger your vomit reflex.

The question is, do you take the curves or do you stay on the well-known path? 

My life has been upside down since 2013. In a good way. Because of the experiences related to publishing Becoming Beauty, I've reevaluated how I see myself. For over ten years I have been The Queen of Kindergarten. My career as the Kindergarten Teacher Extraordinaire has been my entire identity. Not that anyone knew about it, but writing was always just something I did. It had never defined me. Until my name was printed on the cover of Becoming Beauty. Oh so quickly I became Sarah E Boucher, author. 

Accepting that there was more to me than my chosen career as an educator was a huge mental shift. The ups and downs aren't what I'm used to, but the process is amazing. Each day I'm learning more about who I am and who I am becoming. And I love that.  

 We all encounter twists and turns in life. How we respond to them defines us.

In writing: The planned outcome. The perfect resolution. The safe road. But sometimes the best ideas come mid-project when the only option is doing some substantial rewriting. Throwing your heart and soul into a project is what makes life exciting and makes stories magical.

In editing: Passing your work into someone else's hands is an act of faith. The most horrifying thing you may ever do is trust someone to make your best better. No matter what the outcome of that interchange, the process will grow you as a writer. (And hey, nobody said you had to listen to any of their comments...)

In life: There's nothing wrong with being happy with your place in life. There is something terribly wrong with going through the motions and feeling miserable and out of place. Believe me, YOU and I were built for something amazing. Whether big or small, in the limelight or behind the scenes, your life should be beautiful.

The question stands: will you take the curves as they come or will you stay on the well known path? Life is teaching me the importance of questioning the easy choices and embracing the good ones. I have no idea how things will turn out, but it will prove interesting!

Thanks for dropping in!  Good luck finding your happy place!

Wannabes Need Not Apply

Wannabe, aspiring, hopeful, etc. Blech! Why do we have a whole collection of words to describe the fact that we're not certain of our writing skills? Personally, I think it's counterproductive to cut the legs out from under our own abilities.  Since this is my blog and after 30+ years I have finally embraced the title of writer, I feel empowered enough to help others determine if they have what it takes to be writers.

Following is a simple quiz to weed out the wannabes from the writers.  Are you ready?  Great! Let's play:

Are You A Writer?

(wannabees need not apply)

Strangely enough, some children are genuinely passionate about writing.  These are the individuals who are so desperate to write that they will write anything, anywhere, and with whatever is on hand. For instance, one of my kindergartners brought me a love note written on a rolled out toilet paper tube. Now THAT is passion.

So, you ever made up your own stories?

This is a characteristic of mature writers who possess a broader world view. Through their writing, they share what they have learned as well as their ideas and opinions on matters they consider important.  Public speakers also engage in most of these activities, but if they don't put pen to paper--editorials, blog posts, etc.--I'm not counting them as writers. Sorry!

So, do you feel the need to comment on interesting events, natural phenomena, and other cool stuff?

Lastly, what about:

Poetry?

Fan fiction?

Blogging?

Journaling?

Music?

(Apparently three questions are all I can handle. Probably because I'm a writer and I'd rather be writing. But this is really pretty simple.)

If you answered yes to any, all, or some of the above questions:

CONGRATULATIONS!

In the immortal words of Loki, Ta-da! 
You're officially a writer! Do a happy dance! (Or, you know, go write something, which is probably what you were going to do anyway.)

Now that you have this important information, what will you do with it? You can hold it inside, like a beautiful secret, letting it blossom and grow as you expand your skills as a story weaver. Or, you may choose to share your gift with the world. Whatever you do, my best wishes go with you. Embrace your awesome, my friends.

For information on what I've done since I faced the fact that I'm a writer, look back at Embracing the Fangirl Within, Finding Myself in Literature, or There Are Weirdos For Everyone which details my journey out of denial and into a contract.  Happy writing and reading!